Sunday Post 86: Not What I Expected

My life – it isn’t what I thought it was going to be.  No, this wasn’t how it going to turn out.

I was going to get married, have children, be wealthy and own a beach house.  My kids would be beautiful and always respectful.  They’d be popular enough, make good grades.  I’d have a ton of grandchildren.  They’d call me something off the wall like “Hammer” or “Jayshon.” 

I chose a younger wife.  She was to die after me. 

But she didn’t.  And I don’t have a beach house.

I think a lot of people envisioned something different.

Who would expect their cute little toddler to turn to drugs as a teen?  Who’d have thought that the man they loved so much would cheat on her?  Lose a job?  Not me. 

Some never got married, probably not the plan at age 22.  Others couldn’t have kids.  A few lost a child or their spouse at an early age.  Deep depression and anxiety set in for a couple of my friends, and several have fought significant battles with physical illness.

What do you do with that?  What do you do with a life that didn’t meet expectations?

A friend of mine, who has been through the ringer, recently told me that she can’t wait for her future.  She said, “God has something incredible planned for me.  I can’t wait to see what it is!”  There was true excitement in her voice. 

She told me the same was true for me.

It’s easy for to feel like you’ve reach the mountaintop – that the best is over.  But I’m not sure about that. 

There come points in life where you have to reinvent yourself.  Maybe it’s when your kids go to college.  Maybe it’s when your wife dies.

When that time comes, it’s about having the courage to step out of your comfort zone.  Some get that courage from their faith in God.  Others feel an internal drive.  Some never do step.  They decide that it won’t get better – that the best is behind them.

I can’t let that happen.  I do think God has some great things in store for me and some even greater things for my kids. 

I may not climb the exact same mountain, but I think I can find one with an equally beautiful view.  That’s why I started writing.  That’s why I tried out for “A Christmas Carol” last year.  That’s why I’m going to the 10th grade parent dessert social on Saturday even though I’m probably not going to know a soul. 

It’s all uncomfortable.  It’s also all necessary for the ascent.

I”m not sure what the next mountaintop will look like.  But it’s got to look better than the valley.

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15 Comments

  1. Aunt Susan

     /  August 26, 2012

    Oh yeah, the mountaintop is always much better than the valley. We just have to go through the valley knowing we will climb up again. Hope your mountaintops were good this week, and will be good for a long time. I’m waiting for my to show up, but I think it may be right around the corner!

    Reply
  2. Wanda Easley

     /  August 26, 2012

    This blog with its beautiful writing and insight helps make my journey a much richer one. I frequently send it on to others. And it may just be that day’s mountaintop for some. Thank you!

    Reply
  3. Such a beautiful blog. I’m so happy I read it today. I agree that God has a plan for you — for all of us. We get things in life we never expected but even in the darkest moments, we are not alone. Keep taking those steps. Eventually, you’ll be out of the tunnel and you’ll see and feel sunlight on your path again. A step at a time.

    Reply
    • Danny Tanner

       /  August 26, 2012

      I do see sunshine, it’s just got a lot of clouds in it!

      Reply
  4. Susan Disher

     /  August 26, 2012

    A keeper…will save to savor and run around in my head when I need reminding there is always a bend in the road ahead…

    Reply
  5. GodCountryGolf

     /  August 26, 2012

    Hi Danny. Maybe a wonderful life (like finally reaching that mountaintop) is more valuable when the lessons to acquire it are hard-fought. Our pastor posed this question today…”What if the future God wants for you is hiding right now in your biggest problem, your worst failure or your biggest fear?” He encouraged us to redefine our problems/failures/fears and face them with God’s strength. He also said, “God goes before us. He prepares us. God is ordering our footsteps.” Good to know as we continue our ascent. 🙂

    Reply
    • Danny Tanner

       /  August 26, 2012

      Sometimes He’s slow!

      Reply
      • GodCountryGolf

         /  August 27, 2012

        I know! It’s hard to wait on Him. But, I do believe He has a plan for each of us.

  6. momtravels

     /  August 27, 2012

    Thank you for this post, and for this blog. And thank you for reminding me that I need to step out and continue to trust that God has more in store for my life. My husband died 14 months ago from a brain tumor. We were married for 20 years and have two beautiful daughters. God has much more planned for my daughters and I, just as you know God has more for you and your daughters; it’s just a matter of being patient and stepping out in faith when the opportunities for growth are presented to us. Thanks for sharing your journey with us!

    Reply
    • Danny Tanner

       /  August 27, 2012

      Don’t be afraid to jump – you might find something really, really good.

      Reply
  7. It IS uncomfortable. I hear you, loud and clear. Blessings on all of us as we climb, no matter what the mountain throws at us.

    Reply
  8. The beautiful view at the end of the hard climb is what makes the struggle worth it. If we didn’t struggle and didn’t have to fight sometimes, we wouldn’t appreciate the beauty in what we have. Thanks for sharing your story with us.

    Reply
  9. Climb that mountain! What’s on top is worth the hike!

    Reply

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