A friend of mine is up and moving her family to Nashville this summer. She has a great job opportunity and has thought about this major decision for quite some time now. She’s making the leap! Significant and difficult change. Scary. I really respect her for taking the plunge.
I don’t like to plunge. I find it more comfortable to sit on the side of the pool. It’s warmer. It’s comfortable. I know what it feels like outside of the water. What if I jump in and it’s too cold? What if it’s too deep? What if I get water in my ear? If I don’t like it and have to get back out and dry back off. It’s much, much easier to stay on the deck.
I wonder if some of my fears have been magnified since Lisa died. I guess that’s normal. Once you go through a tragedy, there are going to be scars. But I think there is potential to lose out on life if I don’t figure out a way to put my suit on and dive on in.
I fear loss. What if I get too close to someone and they leave or die? I’m scared to death I’m going to lose again. I’m not sure I could weather that storm. It’s too painful. I can’t face it.
The sad thing is that the greatest joy of my life came from a deep, deep dive: finding Lisa. As bad as it hurt to lose her, I’d go through it all again for a single day together.
There are a lot of things to be scared of – it could be loss, it could be change, it could be putting yourself in a new social situation – my grief counselor once told me to take Salsa lessons (I didn’t). Maybe it’s a job, leaving the comfort of something miserable. It could be going back to school, moving to a different city, or trying out for A Christmas Carol!
A lot of us have faced hard things; might be time to tackle another one. Could be missing out on another greatest joy.
The Real Fuller House 
76sanfermo
/ May 26, 2013So true and wise , so introspective , so courageous , in spite of all!
There’s a new Danny ,out there , why preventing him from living?
Pam
/ May 26, 2013Bruce I am praying for you! I think Lisa would encourage you to dive deep!
Danny Tanner
/ May 27, 2013don’t want to bump my head!
Anna Lea West
/ May 26, 2013You’ll know when to dive deep again … I know it.
jennigreenmiller
/ May 26, 2013I think the question is, what advice would you give your daughters? Would you want them to be afraid, or dive deep and go on living?
Danny Tanner
/ May 27, 2013Interesting point of view
Baldeep Kaur
/ May 27, 2013Well written!
Losing my dad to cancer when I was 12 has seeded a fear inside my soul, that makes me feel afraid of losing my husband to something I can’t control. I understand your feelings but fight it. Any fear or negative emotion should not control your life.
I know my dad wants me to be happy and now that insecurity or fear is slowly fading away from my life. So give yourself a chance, an opportunity, to dive deep into unknown territories. You will do just fine.
Danny Tanner
/ May 27, 2013good advice
Baldeep Kaur
/ May 28, 2013🙂
thethreelittlebirds
/ May 27, 2013Your greatest joys will always be by your side and in your heart no matter what the decision – safe, crazy, wrong or right. A family who finds joy from each other is on solid ground! You are much braver than you give yourself credit for, but listen to you your internal naggings. I am somewhat convinced that they might be that still, small voice!
Zachtacular1
/ May 27, 2013Beautiful and thought provoking post Mr. Tanner. I will keep you in my prayers and I know you will make the right choice. I am sorry for your loss and I can’t imagine the pain you must have gone through. I agree with you on change. It is frightening but it can bring the happiest of experiences in the end.
http://lifeismuyfantastico.wordpress.com/
Danny Tanner
/ May 29, 2013I think you’re right. Thanks for remembering us.
lifeisanadventure
/ May 31, 2013I’m a plunger by default (being married to the military does that). I find myself thrust into new places with new people and challenges I couldn’t have imagined. Over time I’ve learnt to embrace this and all it entails. Some times I come up battered and bruised and wondering if it was all worth it but I am buoyed by the experiences and people that have become part of my life for which I am so grateful. I am fortunate to have my husband by my side though and I cannot imagine your loss. Good luck 🙂
Danny Tanner
/ June 1, 2013Thank you – we get through!
micey
/ June 15, 2013I can relate. I have a strong fear of heart break.