Sunday Post 160: They’re Getting Older

It’s interesting to watch your parents get old.  I imagine my kids feel the same way.

One of my “second” moms growing up died recently.  It broke my heart.  Doesn’t seem like so long ago when we were vacationing together at Litchfield beach – playing cards, sitting by the pool, eating dinner at that humongous picnic table.

One year when in my teens, we were playing a huge game of Spoons.  It is a card game where you work to get four of a kind.  There are one fewer spoons scattered on the table than there are players.  The first person getting all four of one card quietly grabs a spoon and then, anyone can snatch one.  The player left without a spoon is the loser.

On this particular day I was rushed out of the bathroom and threw on a robe – just a robe – don’t ask me why.  Being relatively competitive, I jumped across the table to grab the only utensil left.  My robe flew above my waist exposing all of what should have been private to my mom, my friends and my mom’s friends.  Yes, I inadvertently showed my mother’s friends my business in order to win a card game.

Sweet moment – well sort of – gone by.

When do your parents stop caring for you and you start caring for them?

I’m not there yet with my folks, but when their friends get down, it makes me think.

My dad’s heart is now a stent farm.  My mom is well save her hip issues, massive allergies, swallowing problems, her teeny bladder – hmmm, maybe she isn’t well.

As much as they’ve done for me, the payback should be tremendous.

But, if I know them, there will be a limit to what they’ll allow my brother and me to do.

Whatever their issues, I’m game.  Yeah, I guess it is a responsibility and a duty to help, but that’s not why I’ll be there.  I’ll be there because I love them.  I’ll be there because they’ve been there for me.

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7 Comments

  1. We are the sandwich generation. Speaking from personal experience, it is very difficult to care for your parent and also have your own family. The worst, though, is watching them die. It is horrific and yet, it’s an honor.
    Love them now. Talk about things. Their childhood, your childhood, their wishes…….Sigh.

    Reply
  2. Your parents are amazing people, incredible parents and grandparents and such faithful servants of Christ…and best of all, ya’ll enjoy each other so much. Beautiful!

    Reply
  3. Carolanne

     /  March 16, 2014

    I really know what you mean. You know good ole Pam has tried to leave us more than once. I picked up everything, left my job (that I love) and moved my family to Florida in order to be there and take care of her as her personal nurse. I did it because I love her and I was afraid that she would die and I wouldn’t be there. Between numerous Doctor appointments and multiple trips to the hospital and stays in ICU, we slowly started to get a handle on her uncontrolled diabetes. Her health has greatly improved. However, I nearly lost my marriage at the same time. Everything works out for the best, that’s what my Mimi used to say. We picked ourselves up and moved back to Georgia and I went back to my job and mom and dad will be moving here in May. Where they can be near all of their kids. I would do anything for my parents because they have done the same for all of us. I know that part of me will go when they go. Why can’t we keep them forever?

    Reply
  4. I think about this a lot, as a child & as a parent. I feel you.

    Reply
  5. Reblogged this on 100% and commented:
    #Introspection

    Reply
  6. These contemplations are so sensitive. Nice for your family to have your care and concern.

    Reply

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