Be Loved

Homeless Sign

What touched me most was that Wednesday, the day our mission trip with the middle school youth from my church led us to the Be Loved House.  The day before, I got to run the cardboard crusher at the Food Bank.  It was cool.  Really cool.  Tossing out the 50 lb. bags of potatoes into the enormous dumpster, not so cool.  I don’t dig puss oozing spuds.

Two days before, we pulled weeds at a day care center and sorted clothes for a Veteran’s shelter.  Both were jobs that needed to be done, but neither allowed me to interact to a great extent with those we were trying to serve.

But Wednesday, we pulled up to an old house near the heart of downtown.  The white picket fence in front of the dilapidated home was in fairly good shape.  There was a hand spray painted sign that read:  Black Lives Matter.  The cozy front yard had tables with chairs arranged in groups of four or five.

The kids headed in the front door walking through the porch which was set up as a clothes closet for folks who struggle with homelessness.  They didn’t even seem to notice the transgender person having a conversation with a dude in blue jeans at one of the tables.  But I did.  She, like everyone who walked in that house that day, would be loved.  Because in their opinion, if God can love them, they can surely work hard to love others.

I say folks who struggle with homelessness because Amy, the caretaker of the Be Loved House, informed us that they were people first.  I’m not referred to as a Love Handles Person.  I’m just a person who struggles with love handles.

After Amy explained to us that her family intentionally moved into poverty to try to minister to folks who might need them, we walked across the street to the Senior Center with baskets full of vegetables and breads.  Each Wednesday, they give it all away for free.

The kids had the mini farmer’s market under control, so I took it upon myself to sit with the old folks and listen to their stories.  One 98-year-old told me he liked to dance.  So Michelle and her friends came to his table, and we cranked up some bluegrass on the iPhone.  He wasn’t kidding!

I then spent about 20 minutes talking to a woman who was disenfranchised from her entire family.  She was divorced.  Her children and sister didn’t talk to her – she hadn’t seen them in a decade.  Her parents were dead.  She was sitting by herself.  It might be that I am her best friend.

I did take the time to have a conversation with Dee Dee, the woman who was transgender.  Surprisingly, we talked about arthritis.  She just had surgery on her neck.  I have a bit in my thumb joint.  I’m guessing that’s not the only thing we have in common.

On Sundays, Amy washes clothes for folks in the community.  They just drop them off at her house.  I hadn’t thought about not being able to walk to my basement and wash my stuff any time I darn well please.

Queen Mother was a beautiful African-American woman who led singing at our bible study that day.  She lives in the Be Loved House too.  Her personality was big.  She preached to us a bit.  One of the kids asked her if some people thought she was nuts.  She said, “I’m nuts for Jesus!”  Michelle wrote that quote on her fingers with a Sharpie.

When we passed out popsicles at the park, the two women I met encouraged me to let my daughters know how much I love them.  Maybe their father didn’t.  I will heed their advice.  I can’t get over the open sore one had on her nose.

We were told, although it was technically illegal, that folks who looked like us could get away with standing on the lawn under the tree at the large bank in town.  We could also take a nap in the park.  But if we were perhaps black, or unshaven, or in worn clothes, we’d be encouraged to move along.

The kids had to map out a bus route for a hypothetical man named Mike who lived outside of the city because he couldn’t afford the rent in town.  He had to be at McDonald’s by 6 AM to make the biscuits and his $7.50 per hour.  Unfortunately, the bus didn’t start running until 6.  Not sure what I’d do if I was in his situation, maybe stay home and draw unemployment.  Good thing that’s hypothetical.

It’s hard to raise three kids alone.  It’s harder with an annual salary of $15,600.

You know what I missed the most when I was sleeping on the floor of a church building for five nights?  Ice.  I couldn’t readily have ice in my drinks.

Pathetic.

I missed ice.

These women on the streets didn’t have tampons, they didn’t have a place to pee, they carried their belongings, ALL of them, on their backs.  And I missed ice.  I’m ashamed of myself.

There is a lot of mental illness out there.  Some of the folks I met probably take advantage of the system.

Had I been born under different circumstances, maybe I would too.

Advertisements
Leave a comment

12 Comments

  1. Pretty inspiring Bruce. Nothing like your own cross for God to make you wide open to the plight of others. I’ve noticed that in myself after losing Nancy only 3-1/2 months ago. There is a new level of empathy, compassion and love that was not there previously. Why does it take such tragedy to wake us up? You remain an inspiration to me in the road ahead my friend.

    Reply
    • Danny Tanner

       /  August 12, 2015

      You appreciate so much more when you experience loss. It is a weird thing.

      Reply
  2. Empathy at it’s finest.

    Reply
  3. Lissa

     /  August 12, 2015

    I liked this post a lot. Thanks…

    Reply
  4. This was a very profound experience. I pray God gives us more empathy.

    Reply
  5. Hearing about your experience is humbling – – thanks for sharing and for your honesty.

    Reply
  6. check out my blog
    please and thank you

    Reply
  7. ice is important. Thank you for helping the Be Loved House. My church (Grace Cov the one with carpeted floors) has a program that it supports called Food Connection that sends all the “leftover” food from participating restaurants and caterers to Be Loved.
    When I worked with Head Start, and a child would have lice, I became aware of the ignorance of people who have had privileges. When you are poor and your child comes home with lice, you not only have to figure out how to purchase the meds but you are supposed to “wash” everything. If you don’t have a washing machine and a big ol box of Tide then you will have to haul all this to a laundry mat, and spend quite a bit of money.
    Laundry.
    When my washer broke, with 3 kids, in a day and a half we were backed up.
    laundry.
    that clean smell.
    I think I needed to be reminded again of what a big deal it is to own a washer and dryer.
    She just washes everyone’s clothes. wow. I had no idea.
    I’ll bring you some ice next year.

    Reply
  8. Sarah Rowan

     /  August 15, 2015

    Purity of spirit , compassion and wisdom combined to form love as a verb ❤️

    Reply
  9. you’re such an inspiration!!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s