Fool my twice, shame on me


Some of you may recall my full on hatred for Time Warner.  I am certain that The Prince of Darkness leads their staff training sessions and that Bernie Madoff created their business plan.  However, after about eight weeks without NBC, due to a dispute between our local affiliate and AT&T, I caved.  I called Spectrum, merged with Time Warner now, to see what they could do.  I really, really wanted to watch This is Us and Jimmy Fallon.

They were kind and offered me basically the same package I had at AT&T for $140 LESS per month.  The dollar signs lit up in my eyes like a cartoon Bugs Bunny.  I switched.

“So” I asked the salesman as I wrote down his every word to ensure I had not misunderstood, “let me confirm.  I will receive 360 channels with my cable package, three DVR boxes, home phone service with unlimited long distance and 6M internet service for $128 per month?”

“Yes sir.”

“And I can port my existing home phone number?”


“What are the other taxes and fees that are not in the $128?”  I did not want to be surprised with an FCC add on of $140.

He put me on hold.

He returned.

Your grand total will be $133 per month.

“All in?”

“All in!”

This has been an ongoing issue in my life – this inability to stop myself from entering into agreements that I know will ultimately be painful.  In elementary school I continued to ask Lisa Simpson to be my girlfriend even after she dumped me four times.  She smelled so good.

In the back of my mind, I knew this had the potential to go awry, so I questioned my salesman again going through all of the features and quoting the price a second time.  He confirmed, and since they record the calls, a prompt shared with me by their automatic attendant, I figured I’d have proof on record.

The first time they came to install, they had not set up the port of my existing, 25-year old, home phone number.  I sent them away.

The second time they came to install, they had not set up the port of my existing, 25-year- old, home phone number.  I sent them away again.

The third time they came, they said I had only ordered 1 DVR and that if I got three, the price would increase to $156.

Mrs. Moreaux, my eighth grade math teacher once told me if it was too good to be true, it was too good to be true.  I should have listened.

I was in Nashville at the time, my parents were at my house overseeing the installation.  I pulled out of my conference about six times to discuss the situation and eventually sat in the hall at the Aloft Hotel on the phone with my Spectrum friends.  After being disconnected twice, and weeding back through the automated systems to a human, my blood pressure rising, they assured me that they would pull my initial phone call and if indeed I had been promised $128 for three DVRs, I would get that price.  They also said they would call me once they pulled my recorded call.

They installed.  They did not call.

The next day, I talked to them again in the Nashville International Airport.  Again, I was assured that I would be called back once the call was pulled.  This was a Friday.

They did not call.

The following Monday, the newspaper shared an article that the dispute between AT&T and the local NBC affiliate had been resolved.  Naturally, five days after I switched to the enemy.  A tear rolled down my cheek.

On Wednesday I called back.  I yelled at the automated voice, cursing like a sailor.  I was sent down rabbit holes, cut off the line unable to reach an attendant.  My head spun round nearing exploding when I finally got Motsey on the phone.  I asked her name and wrote it down.  Motsey assured me she would take care of my situation.  She told me she would escalate my request.  That sounded like progress.  I was being escalated to a higher authority, the mecca of Spectrum I imagined.  I asked if I could call her back.  She explained it was just an inbound calling system.  That is smart on their part for I would have verbally abused those before her had I been able to reach them.  I felt better.  She was so nice.  I believed in Motsey.

She did not call back.

I tried two more times.  The final time asking for the supervisor’s supervisor.  He offered me a token – a gift card to Hardee’s or something insignificant like that.  At this point I would have gladly paid the additional $140 a month to save my sanity.

He said, “Mr. Tanner.  I can’t speak for others you’ve talked to at Spectrum, but I WILL call you back.  You have my word,” which is worth ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ‘cause his behind did not call me back either.

How in the hell do you run a business like that?  I simply don’t get it.  El Chapo is more trustworthy than them.

I am back with AT&T.  I cancelled within 30 days so supposedly the Spectrum episode was free – although they said they would bill me for any outstanding balance.  I will likely owe $128.

Oh, and I am now paying $110 per month with a year-long contract, and I am getting $400 in VISA cards.  Take that Motsey!



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  1. Mel Ham

     /  December 20, 2017

    they are truly the devil only second in line to Walmart.

  2. Mary Ann Olsen

     /  December 20, 2017

    You hit my last nerve with this one. It’s the classic “bait & switch” corporate business plan. I WISH I COULD GET EITHER SPECTRUM OR ATT. The struggle in rural areas where cable is not available and “won’t be available in your lifetime” even more daunting.
    So happy these guys are getting a new corporate tax break AND the loss of net nutrallity.

    • Danny Tanner

       /  January 2, 2018

      You be glad you can’t get either. You will live longer than those of us who have to argue with them!

  3. Vicky M. Langley

     /  December 20, 2017

    This is too funny. Please put it on FB so the world can enjoy and commiserate.

  4. I gave up cable years ago, bought a Roku device and Hulu subscription.
    PS – This Is Us is on Hulu! Which doesn’t do you any good since you just signed a contract with AT&T 😀

  5. Julia G Hooks

     /  December 20, 2017

    You can get everything NBC on Hulu!

  6. David Hall

     /  December 20, 2017

    My base rate was $120 BUT all the Add-ons cost an extra $110 –
    2 DVR’s + service, 1 STB, 2 Guides, internet and phone modem, etc, etc. Finally fed up and switched to FIBRANT. Very happy.

  7. Evie Lichti

     /  December 20, 2017

    Motsey? MOTSEY!! She works for Century Link, I swear she does!! She treated me exactly the same way saying she’d call me back and never did! I think they’re all in cahoots w/ one-another! O, well . . . it gives us something to ‘beef’ about and they have a J-O-B (I guess).

    In spite of everything else, have a Merry Christmas!

    O, yeh, – just as a side note – my niece writes some of the scripts for This Is Us.



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