My youngest one, Michelle, the one who is headed to college in approximately 18 nights including this one which is about over, and I ate dinner at the Players Retreat tonight over by NC State. The PR is an old Raleigh haunt – I went there in college. Great food. Good service. Sort of a know you by your name hangout. The atmosphere makes the summer flies bearable.
We had a great dinner with an appropriately attentive waitress. Our conversation ranged from spring rods and curtains for the college dorm “closet” to recanting old day camp cheers that she might be able to recycle tomorrow at work as a youth counselor at the downtown YMCA.
When we got home, I plunked out the melody of a few tunes, and she casually sang along. She has a beautiful voice. At one point, I moved to the den to pay the VISA bill, and she practiced a song we’re trying to convince her to sing at our wedding later this year. I held it together when she walked through the room, but had she checked the credit card statement, it would have been damp. I sure am going to miss that voice in the house.
I’m not sure which of us has the most angst about her going away, the kid who is headed to UNC or the parent who is watching her grow up.
It seems so surreal. Poof. All three of them are grown.
I saw a commercial yesterday with a father holding his kid on his shoulder. For some reason the baby’s onesie caught my eye. I have held that same child, in that same outfit, in that same position, and in my mind not so long ago.
I try to convince myself it won’t be different – she’s only 30 minutes away. I don’t see her that much when she lives here full time. Things won’t change.
They will to some extent. They are supposed to. They are supposed to for her. They are supposed to for me.
I am happy in my soul for Michelle. I am excited for her. The world is her oyster! The future is bright for us all.
But for the next three weeks, I think I might just lament a bit.